THE YEAR JUST GONE BY

The year 2012 which has just gone by unfortunately witnessed more Downs than Ups. What with price increases of many consumer goods – especially sharp ones when it came to diesel, petrol and gas – coupled with contaminated oil which damaged countless number of vehicles for which as usual no one has been made responsible or accountable.


We were treated to several spectacles such as the Museum robbery where a culprit has now been nabbed leaving doubts in people’s minds as to how one sole thief took so many artefacts just like a petty thief in a village stealing a bunch of bananas in the night. We also witnessed the burning down of a section of the Colombo Kachcheri destroying valuable documents which has now been established as an arson attack by an interested party.

In the field of education, we were unfortunate enough to see the Z-score muddle and the leaking of examination papers on various occasions thus making the students lose their confidence on the whole system of education – but nevertheless the same set of ministers remain as if nothing serious has happened.

Sadly, the cases of minor girls getting raped by local government politicians belonging to the ruling party went on the increase, but no concrete action appears to have been taken to put a stop to this menace and even the PS Chairman of down South who killed a foreign UN volunteer and gang-raped his fiancé have still not been given due punishment due to political influence.

In the field of sports, although we failed to clinch the twenty-twenty World Cup, we had our own cricket captain Kumar Sangakkara being honoured at the ICC awards and then he himself achieving the feat of 10,000 test runs : the only achievements in the year gone by that we can be proud of as a nation in the face of all enveloping gloom.

World attention is now focused on us due to the controversial Impeachment motion against the Chief Justice and the lowly conduct of the Select Committee members– an episode we should have really avoided in the current context of the country already getting a bad name within the international community.

But, still, all is not gloomy : we have now established a sort of a world record with the most number of hits on Google search engine for the elusive word called “Sex” – and this in spite of advice given by a very loyal, patriotic minister asking the citizens to refrain from using Google!

PEOPLE'S RIGHTS AND PEOPLE'S WILL

In the ongoing battle between the legislature and the judiciary, the Parliament claims primacy and authority on the basis that it is the representative of the people, i.e. the repository of sovereignty as emblazoned in our Constitution. In a country of 21 million, eligible voters total some 6 million and out of this, say, only 50-60% use their ballot, and if a governing party gets slightly above 50% of these votes, then the percentage drops to a mere 10% or so. It is this percent age of people that the members of parliament claim have given them the supremacy to do whatever they feel is right for the total population of the country. Adding insult to injury, the present government also claims a two-third majority thus giving itself a licence to ridicule the judiciary and its occupants. In fact, this so called two-third majority is an ill-gotten one through horse-trading – and there again, it does not reflect the actual will of the people who exercised their democratic right to cast their votes to opposition political parties. In fact, this is a massive travesty of justice legalized by a friendly ex-Chief Justice.


Further, when one carefully looks at the characters of those who got elected to the Parliament by whatever means, one cannot help but notice that most of them are a degenerate and depraved lot – hardly the material one would call “law makers”. A more appropriate description would be clowns or jokers who are adept at telling all sorts of lies and providing unlimited free entertainment to the gallery, while at the same time fattening their pockets through various means – mostly illegal. For instance, one is fully justified in questioning as to how many of those Ministers and MPs now making a hue and cry about financial dealings and declarations of assets of the Chief Justice and sitting in judgement over her, have in fact complied with that requirement and how many can provide reasonable explanations as to how they came to be millionaires and billionaires overnight. In fact, it is worthwhile investigating as to how those who could not even afford a push bicycle not so long ago, are now owning luxury cars and even going to get down racing cars for themselves and their family members.

Sadly, the terms “People’s rights” and “People’s will” are nothing but gibberish in our context.

WHO OWNS THIS COUNTRY?

Just a few days back, our Minister of Disaster Management, Mahinda Amaraweera, was seen driving on the wrong side of the road up Bauddhaloka Mawatha, damaging another vehicle and subsequently threatening the female passenger of the damaged car for taking pictures of the accident scene, whilst a policeman stood in the middle of the road and observed the whole incident nonchalantly. Some goons of the Minister then entered the scene and threatened the lady and grabbed her camera. One of the goons then occupied the driver’s seat claiming that he was the one driving the vehicle and the Minister then went away – all the while the cop just standing and pretending not to have seen the incident. A passing three-wheel driver who observed the whole incident muttered: “this is what happens when one votes for animals” – which in one sentence summarized the very precarious situation the whole country is in. When the new IGP took over, one of his lofty ideals was to clean up and improve the Police service and when one witnesses this sort of incidents, one can easily surmise to what extent he has succeeded!


There are enough media reports of the so called “doctor” Minister Mervyn Silva threatening and tying government officials to trees and decreeing that in his fiefdom of Kelaniya, he will not permit the sale of beef and chicken, and sometimes back he even announced that he will ban bringing in vegetables to Kelaniya as he wanted every one living in his electorate to grow at least one vegetable in their gardens!

One wonders if this particular minister owns that part of the country which he claims to represent because if such prohibitions are to be implemented – most probably due to the ushering of a Dharma Raajya – then such bans should apply to the whole country, because as far as we know there is only one government in this country.

With all this talk of Kings and royal families with crown princes, and the ordinary people in their foolishness believing that the whole granary and treasury belongs to the King and his family as in the days of the ancient Sinhala kings, the inevitable question that arises is : Who owns this country?

THE AGE OF CHIVALRY IS NO MORE

There was a recent report that a women’s rights organization had written a letter to the Speaker of the Parliament condemning the use of vulgar and sexist language uttered by ministers and parliamentarians against the Chief Justice, which in fact is tantamount to sexual harassment.


In fact, the Chief Justice is not the only victim of such degenerative sexism. The electronic and print media is full of reports of vulgar and sexist statements made against women parliamentarians and activists by the politicians. It was just recently that Minister Kumar Welgama made sexist comments on UNP MP and former Mrs. World, Rosie Senanayake inside the august assembly itself. Minister Mervyn Silva, who has been conferred with a ministry called “Public Relations” continues to use vulgar language – both inside and outside the parliament – against the Chief Justice. In fact, this particular minister, during a televised talent show made very dirty remarks against a female contestant referring to her anatomy suggestive of the act of “suckling” – this contestant also being a member of parliament. These remarks were seen live by many viewers, including children. One can just imagine what examples such ministers are giving to the public as to their upbringing. Wimal Weerawansa is another minister who, during the PSC sittings, used derogatory remarks such as “mad woman” and other sexual innuendo against the CJ.

Media is full of reports of local UPFA politicians who sexually assault young and minor girls and go scot free using their political clout. In fact, one such local government politician even celebrated a “century” of rapes as if it is a world record. Even foreign women had not been spared as in what happened in Tangalle where a local UPFA politician not only murdered her partner but also subjected the lady to gang rape.

In neighbouring India, a politician is reported to have said that rape is just like bad weather and since one cannot do much about it, the best thing is to relax and en joy while it lasts!. From the way things are going, our politicians too seem to be trying to emulate that Indian politician or even trying to do better.

Sadly, in this country, the age of chivalry is a relic of the past.

VULGAR PATRIOTISM

The recently concluded Colombo Night Car races no doubt provided enough thrills and fun to the miniscule section of the “nouveau riche” population who have little else to do. At the same time, the post event show provided enough titillation to the senses of the fun seekers by way of a vulgar skin show by some East European dancers.


What is really surprising is that so far no voice has been raised by any of those super-patriots who scream day in and night out about “international conspiracies” and erosion of cultural values due to foreign influence. Neither have the religious organizations such as Bodu Bala Sena who make a hue and cry of “conversions” from one religion to another uttered a word against this latest attempt to “convert” a nation with a 2500-years proud culture to the vulgar, semi-naked culture of the Europeans – never mind, western or eastern.

And then we have the MP monks of the “Hela Karumaya” who protested vigorously against some foreign artistes and their shows on account of their personal behaviour and alien culture thus putting a stop to such shows and even organizing violent acts against some entertainers; now observing deadly silence against this X-rated vulgar exhibitionism by some cheap dancers in the presence of families with children.

It is a real shame that those who claim exclusive patent rights to patriotism and those who have pledged to usher in a “Dharma Raajya” are hiding their heads in the sand and behavimg like the monkeys who see no evil, lest they offend the sensibilities of the King and the Clown Princes for whose benefit these vulgar shows are staged.

With the soon to be opened Casino Zone and with it the inevitable invasion of more East Europeans for many other forms of vulgar activities, one wonders if this is the Miracle of Asia that has been promised to us.

It is not for nothing that Samuel Johnson once said “Patriotism is the last resort of the scoundrel”

VISITORS FROM OUTER SPACE

During the past few days, one was able to see in the media several reports of aliens from outer space attempting to visit our country and some other strange phenomenon.


Some people reported strange lights coming from the sky whilst some others reported meteors hitting the earth, with some people even producing sample pieces of meteorites.

Then there was the other strange happening of Red Rain which still baffles the authorities. Close on the heels came the rain of dead fish!

With all this talk of the world going to end in a couple of days based on the Mayan’s Calendar, these strange happenings have baffled many. But as any sensible person would know, world is not going to end so soon whatever the doomsday prophets may say.

Now, all of a sudden, the locals are seriously talking of UFOs and other terrestrial creatures which brings to one’s memory a very popular Sinhala song of the eightees titled “Kurumitto” by the music group “Gypsies”

As some wags commented, these extra-terrestial creatures are interested in studying our system of government which is a quasi-dictatorship garbed in a façade of democracy and which is soon due to be declared the “Miracle of Asia”. As the old saying goes, we do impossibilities today and miracles take place tomorrow!

Another wag commented that the reason for the government to increase the price of fuel all of a sudden, even when there is no increase in world market prices, is to deter these ETs coming in their flying dishes to fill their tanks here with our super-quality petrol at cheap prices.

One more school of opinion says that the ETs are here with the intention of kidnapping the members of our PSC who have done such a marvellous job in world record time, so that they can examine their brains and use them to get similar work done in outer space.

SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

With Christmas fast approaching, it is the Season of Goodwill and giving, with most people waiting eagerly for some presents from Santa Claus! So, politicians should not be an exception as they have many needs.


Here is a wish list taking into consideration the current political scenario:

For President Rajapakse : a cure for his phobia of women (Chandrika, Anoma, Shirani)

For the UNP Leader, Ranil: power to be the UNP leader for life time

For Minister Weerawansa: a permanent cure for the supposed to be incurable disease called “verbal diarrhea”

For “doctor” Mervin Silva: to be officially anointed as King of Kelaniya with Lamborghini racing cars for himself and his family members

For Minister Dilan Perera: powers to at least order some buffalos to do his bidding

For crown prince Namal: to conduct night races every night in all parts of the country

For Sarath Fonseka: ability to retain whoever is still left in his party

For Sarath Silva: ability to get back into the good books of the president even at the expense of betraying the legal fraternity

For Sajith Premadasa: strength to challenge the leader and be the presidential candidate next time

For Maithripala Sirisena: Ability to exercise his powers as General Secretary of SLFP to take disciplinary action against at least one wayward member of the party without interference from the top

For Susil Premajayantha: the ability to “hedge” the ill-effects of the “hedging” deal

For Ratnasiri Wickremanayake: to be the Prime Minister once again and avoid the derogatory term of “Gedera Yana Gamang”

And finally, to the citizens of this country:

Wherewithal to at least afford one good meal in a day

Merry Christmas to all!

OF JOKERS, CLOWNS AND COURT JESTERS

The decision of the Chief Justice, Shirani Bandaranaike, to write to the Speaker of the Parliament through her lawyers reporting the abuse and embarrassment caused to her by 2 Ministers of the government who served in the PSC, is to say the least very commendable and timely. Bolstered with the predetermined judgement of the PSC to find the Chief Justice guilty of the charges, these two Ministers were hell-bent on proving their allegiance and loyalty to their Boss in no uncertain terms – just like pet canines do for their master.


Minister Weerawansa, the ex-JVPer, who may have conducted many “kangaroo style” trials of wayward young boys and girls during the hey days of the JVP struggle and also “sentenced” some of them to instant death, may have thought of this committee inquisition too as one of those trials to show his ability to shout and intimidate the “suspects”. They say that little learning is very dangerous and one cannot surely expect any better behavior from such a character, who, as most of the people in the country know, is suffering from an incurable disease called “Verbal Diahorrea” . He has also the unfortunate tendency to give overtime to his mouth when his brain is sleeping (which is most of the time!)

The other Minister, Dilan Perera, is no better when it comes to verbal abuse of his opponents and in this committee, they formed a formidable duo in winning the trophy for the person with the most ability to insult and embarrass.

One waits with abated breath to know the reaction of the Speaker of the Parliament to this complaint against government MPs and one would hope and pray that the Speaker would not, in this instance too, invoke the “supremacy” of the Parliament and defend the uncouth behavior of the two Ministers by decreeing that outside parties have no right or authority to interfere in to the affairs of the elected MPs and it is entirely upto them to behave in any dastardly manner they consider fit within and outside the august assembly, as they are duly elected representatives of the “sovereign people”.

IT'S A "POL MESS" NOW

The announcement of the President the other day that he wants to appoint an “independent committee” to study the Select Committee report on the Impeachment of the Chief Justice came as a bit of surprise as the government side has always been maintaining the supremacy of the legislature and its unquestionable powers to take any action against the judiciary as per the Constitution.


Now the moot point is if the Select Committee proceedings have been conducted strictly as per the Constitution, then why is the need for an “independent committee” to review its decisions, as envisaged by the President, which leaves many questions unanswered, rather than offering a way out of this imbroglio.

Where is the provision in the Constitution to appoint an “independent committee” to review the decisions of a Parliamentary Select Committee appointed by the Speaker under powers vested in him as per the Constitution?

Why is the sudden need for such an independent committee unless of course the President does not have any faith in either the Select Committee members who are mostly his own cabinet ministers or else on the MPs who initially signed the petition against the Chief Justice – all those MPs also belonging to his own political party.

Now it is obvious that the President himself feels that something is wrong somewhere as to the manner in which those entrusted with the responsibility have carried out their tasks, with reports of even a couple of Ministers using unparliamentary language against the Chief Justice who belongs to the fair sex, in a male dominated committee, which just goes to show the uncouth nature of some of those who call themselves cabinet ministers. It would be interesting to see how the proposed “independent committee” would handle the issue and if they would have the courage to recommend disciplinary action against the ministers who misbehaved with the lady Chief Justice.

After all, it would be a Himalayan task for the committee, provided one can find a thoroughly independent person or persons to constitute this committee given the highly charged political atmosphere in the country.

"HUNGER GAMES"

Our politicians, most of whom are guilty of the Seven Deadly Sins, now seem to be more addicted to a particular sin, i.e. Gluttony.


Judging by the way the Members of Parliament from both divides are clamouring to satisfy their limitless taste buds at subsidized rates on tax payers’ account, in addition to enjoying all sorts of luxuries as part of their emoluments, is to say the least an utter shame on that august institution. Whilst one demands Beef, another one demands Pork and one member of the fair sex wants to enhance her beauty by indulging in honey and flakes – all at ridiculously subsidized prices which really amounts to mocking at the less privileged who are fighting tooth and nail on a daily basis just to earn a pittance barely enough to buy some bread and “parippu” for their daily meal.

If these privileged members of the parliament have different or highly sophisticated taste buds than the ordinary public and have a “dola duka” to indulge in exotic foods such as pork, ham, bacon or even venison – that is none of our business as long as they pay for such stuff just like the other people in the country do. What one cannot comprehend is what rights these so called “servants of the people” have to eat off the pockets of the poor public of the country.

One should not also forget that these unfortunate members of the public are forced to take a parcel of a modest rice and curry to their workplace for lunch and to prepare that, their spouses have to get up even before the cock crows.

What is really funny is that after partaking of thoroughly subsidized food, one minister has the audacity to suggest that an amount of Rs. 2,500.- is sufficient for one person to live for a month in this country and another minister is measuring the daily increasing cost of living based on the cost of a Bulath Vita!

KING “KEKILLE” AND “ANDARE” ARE ALIVE AND KICKING

Recent events have proved beyond doubt that we have in our midst reborn King Kekille and Andare to show that History repeats itself!



The Kangaroo court verdict given against General Fonseka smacks of shades of King Kekille and now with the hilarious ex-parte conclusion of the Parliamentary Select Committee against the Chief Justice it has shown once again that King Kekille is alive and kicking.

With an over-enthusiastic electronic and print media disseminating loads of disinformation and propaganda, King Kekille is given a new lease of life not even dreamt of by him in his previous births.

Some of us have heard of the classic tale of how King Kekille punished an innocent by-stander by getting him crushed by his royal elephant for a totally unrelated incident of a house being collapsed killing its occupants. Pretty soon, we might even hear of a modern version of such a judgement from his current reborn “avatar”.

Although “Kavata Andare” was a very innocent and genuine Royal Jester who kept his King and Queen entertained with his harmless antics ; the modern day Andare is a vicious character who somehow manages to keep his King in good spirits with his countless antics. Among some of the classic antics is how he tied a government servant to a tree and got that same person to admit that he himself asked for it! And then he showed to the whole country what a classic joker he is during his visit to the television station Rupavahini sometime back.

And so, in these days where everybody is talking of a King and a Royal Family, it is not surprising that some of these historic characters have thought of being born in this land to reprise their roles.

PUPPETS ON A STRING

It was William Shakespeare who once said : “the whole world is a stage and we are all actors on it”


In the fifties and sixties, the general public were enthralled with way-side puppet shows staged by famous craftsmen from down South and people of all ages really enjoyed these shows during various carnivals and Vesak celebrations where another type of characters called “Olu Bakkos” too entertained the crowds.

Of late, these shows have gone into decline due to the emergence of another breed of characters called political jokers who have now taken over the entire stage and started entertaining the common people. These characters are indeed versatile in performing monkey dances, acrobatics, long jumps, high jumps etc. in addition to noise pollution with their screaming voices.

Noteworthy among these characters are some Ministers of the government who occupy prominent places in the country due to their versatility in these performances. However, none can beat the antics of one particular minister who claims to be a direct descendant of King Dutugemunu, although he has a Portuguese surname. His antics are well recorded such as the beating and sewerage treatment he got from employees of Rupavahini; his act of tying a government servant to a tree; general hulabaloo he creates whenever he attends a public function such as riding bikes without helmets. He has now assumed a new role for himself – that of making babies for those who were not lucky enough to become parents!

One wonders if there is a head of the government in this country because there seems to be not even a whimper of a warning for this joke of a Minister to stop polluting the atmosphere of the country. Instead, he is also allowed to function in multiple roles as Palace Joker, “Duk Gannna Raala” and chief “Dhobi” to clean dirty linen etc.

It is time to change Shakespeare’s words : “The whole country is a stage and all politicians are actors on it, with the ordinary people being mere spectators”

THE FLYING WHITE ELEPHANTS

It has not come as shocking news to many that the so called Budget Airline called Mihin Air has already incurred a loss of 2 billion rupees and that its accumulated loss so far since inception in 2007 is 8.5 billion rupees. To add insult to injury, the annual remunerations paid to the Directors have increased to 11 million rupees – an increase of 4.9 million rupees from the previous year!


The sole purpose of establishing this airline was to boost the ego of the President whose name now adorns newly constructed Ports, Stadiums, Schools, Villages and what not, a la certain old eastern bloc countries where personality cult had almost become a religion. The joke that time was that this venture was likened to a man who had bought a three-wheeler and kept it in his house for personal travels of his family but rented it out when it is free. But, now it appears that even foreign jaunts of the President and his entourage are done not with Mihin but with Sri Lankan airlines by chartering one of their aircrafts. But the so called budget airline continues to fly at great losses to the nation. A flight to Dubai has recently been cancelled several times and ticket monies refunded to the passengers at a loss to the airline.

The Chaiman of both airlines who happens to be the brother in law of the President continues to get an emolument of Rs. 5 lakhs from each airline!

Among other white elephants are the building in New York bought by the Central Bank for a whopping US Dollars 5,075,000.- and the infamous Hedging Deal of the Petroleum Corporation for which not a single culprit has been punished.

The politicians who are behind these white elephants have given new meanings to the phrases “This Land belongs to us” and “Ahasa Apey (the sky is ours)” whilst the common man has to look upto the sky and see the stars (and pretty soon the Satellite with our flag!)